Maybe this season, Dean will learn how Sam felt, how Sam absolutely hated himself, how when Sam looked in the mirror- there was no doubt in his mind that he was a monster. Maybe this Mark Of Cain will make Dean weak, have his eyes grow weary and his hands shake because oh God, he’s turning into a monster, isn’t he? But Sammy will come to him, tell him he isn’t a monster, ain’t anywhere near it- because he’s Dean, he’s saved the world, he’s gone through everything, he names off how many lives Dean’s saved, how he can pull through this.
And maybe, something in Dean’s mind will click.
"Sorry." He’ll say that when Sammy’s telling him this mark doesn’t define him. He’ll say sorry for how many times he let Sammy really believe he was a monster, he’ll let Sammy know that no, I’m not stronger- you, you’ve been through everything- you believed you were a monster since the day you were born, I’m just growing into it, Sammy. I’m sorry, I put so many things on you- blamed you for so many things, I’m sorry, I’m sorry.
Maybe Sam will nod, pat his brother on the back and say, “Apology accepted.” Because Dean’s rambling on, he’s talking about how Sam has been put through hell, lived in the stomach of Hell with Lucifer and Michael, possessed by so many evil things but still had goodness left in his heart.
Pretty soon, Dean freezes, and then he stares right into Sammy’s eyes.
"You wanted to die, and I let you down, Sammy. Sam, I’m sorry." And Sammy’s breathing will cease for a second, because here- here his big brother, the one that was always so prideful, and watchful, and protective, and careful with his words but not his emotions was telling him he was sorry for the one thing he wanted to hear most.
Maybe this season is about Dean being put into Sammy’s shoes, and maybe he’ll realize that Sammy is only being held together by a duct-tape and a few safety pins.
I am Lokitty, of Catgard, and I am burdened with glorious purrrpose.
This windowsill pleases me.
YOU GIVE UP THIS CATNIP DREAM! YOU COME HOME!
AND HE NEVER KNEW THAT HE WAS ADOPTED?!
I DO WHAT I WANT, THORGI!
Reblog if you are in at least one of those fandoms…